No Church for Me
“For a long time, I was just pretending to be a Christian. I only went to church to please my wife. Church was the last place I wanted to be.“But on August 4, 2023, at 5 pm, everything changed. In a private moment with God, I got down on my knees, confessed my sins, and invited Him into my heart. I began serving in church—a place I actually wanted to be! I shared about God’s goodness to me, prayed with coworkers, and asked God to bless their lives. The transformation in my heart was remarkable, and I felt unstoppable. But in late February of 2024, my wife, Juanita, suffered a medical emergency: one of her vertebrae collapsed onto her spinal cord. I prayed and prayed but nothing happened. Still, I kept telling myself and my wife, ‘God is going to get us through this.’
Trials & Turning Points
“God brought Juanita through the surgery, but sadly, more tragedy struck. In May of 2024, my older brother died suddenly of a heart attack. We had just spoken on the phone the night before. I was overwhelmed and heartbroken. After the funeral, we assumed the worst was behind us. But it wasn’t.
“In June of 2024, I needed ankle surgery. I thought it would be an easy thing, but I couldn’t walk or go to church for weeks. The enemy yelled in my ear, ‘I told you so. God let you down—first, your wife; then, your brother; and now, you. You can’t even walk or take care of yourself. And you still want to believe in God? Go ahead and keep trying … you’ll see.’
“I tried my best to hold onto my trust in God, but then came August of 2024: my nephew Officer Darron Burks was killed in the line of duty. He was my oldest sister’s only child. At that moment, my faith was completely shattered. I kept asking, Why, God? Why my nephew? Why my sister? Why my family?
“I felt like I my faith in God was gone. Deep down, I believed He was in control, but I didn’t know how to reconnect with Him in the middle of all this pain and loss. Then, two weeks before Christmas in 2024, we were hit with a fatal blow. My wife was diagnosed with liver cancer. My anger flared again. But this time, something felt different. I heard a quiet voice saying to my heart, ‘You need to pray.’ So, I did.
We Needed a Miracle
“The tumor on Juanita’s liver had grown to 6.5 centimeters, and the doctor couldn’t do surgery until it shrank. After some chemotherapy, the tumor shrank to 3 centimeters. We were thankful and then shocked at what the doctors told us: this type of tumor doesn’t respond to chemotherapy. The doctors, my wife, and I were amazed! That same quiet voice whispered again: ‘Pray.’ And I did. When the tumor was finally removed, it had shrunk to 2 centimeters, and the doctor was able to remove it without a major surgery.
“I had lost my faith. I doubted God. I turned my back on Him. But when I returned to Jesus on my knees—when I humbled myself and prayed again—I heard His voice clearly: ‘After all your anger, your doubt, and giving up on Me … I never left you. I never stopped loving you. I was always there, and I always will be.’
“All of us go through trials, and some shake us to the core. But our faith must remain rooted in God. No matter what you’re going through, keep God first. Keep trusting. Keep believing. Don’t give up. I promise you—God’s got you!”
–Shedrick, part of the Gateway family